Surviving Abuse: 10 Thoughts for Recovery

February 5, 2015

  In a world where "Research says that" seems to be the new fad, it's crucial to acknowledge that understanding abuse goes beyond statistics. It's rooted in the lived experiences of beautiful souls who have survived it. This article offers valuable insights into the recovery process for those who have experienced abuse.

1. Recognizing the Complexity of Abuse:

Abuse isn't always about forced physical or sexual contact. It's a complex and sometimes confusing issue. Survivors should avoid rushing the healing process, understanding that recovery may be slow but ultimately certain.

2. Breaking the Silence:

The moment you break your silence, the process of recovery begins, even if you initially feel more vulnerable. Speaking out is the first step toward healing.

3. Stop Explaining to Everyone:

Avoid justifying or explaining your story to everyone. Those who genuinely understand won't require explanations, and those who don't understand won't, no matter how much you explain. Remember, it's about them, not you.

4. The Victim and the Abuser:

Drawing from a Burmese saying, "If a thorn falls on a leaf, the leaf is pierced. And if a leaf falls on a thorn, it's still the leaf that's pierced." Abuse isn't limited to one gender; it's a personality issue. Recognize the 'thorns' in your life and learn to stay away from them.

5. Forgiveness as Healing:

Develop the habit of forgiving those who are not sorry, accepting the sorry you may never receive. Forgiveness can be a powerful tool in the healing process.

6. Trust and Abuse:

Abusers, often trusted individuals, may still enjoy the trust of many within your family and friends. Surround yourself with those who trust you or take pride in standing alone for what is right. Remember, you're not alone in your experience.

7. Dealing with Misjudgment:

Be prepared to be misquoted and judged by those around you. Healing from abuse has an irregular path, but remember that the worst is behind you.

8. Taking One Day at a Time:

While people may try to tear apart your dignity, don't let it turn you bitter. Focus on positivity, as energy flows where attention goes.

9. Reach Out and Educate:

Extend your hand to others, share your experiences, and raise awareness about abuse so that no one suffers in silence, thinking "It's just me" or "It's my fault."

10. Breaking the Silence:

For all the beautiful souls silently struggling, know that you're not alone. The author stands with you unconditionally. Believe that the world is still a beautiful place, despite the darkness you've experienced. Break the silence and find your path to healing.