Dear Mothers, None of us took upon this journey called “Motherhood” with any training whatsoever, each one of us fine tune our skills as we go along. There is only one perfect mother for your child and that is YOU. Irrespective of what neurological differences our children might have let’s trust that no one, literally no one is going to ever know our child as much as we do, and literally no one is going to take on our journey for us. So let’s do what we can with what we have until we know better. To know better, we sure will need help of various professionals along the way particularly if our child is not developing neuro-typically. It is absolutely okay to seek help and need help at any time. But remember the professionals are not here to stay. It is a profession, a job unlike motherhood for which we will never receive a payment or promotion or vacation and rest assured not even a word of thanks for the 24/7 hours and we cannot quit! We do it for we have chosen this path and we are both responsible and accountable to fulfill it to the best of our abilities. In the majority of therapy centers if not all, the practice of therapy is predominantly child focused and not focused on the family. Mothers (Fathers are usually away making money to afford the therapies) usually accompany the child to the center and are treated like onlookers or passive observers. Well, consider yourself lucky if you are at least given a passive observation , in most cases our role is that of an outsider, waiting outside guessing what goes on inside. Most often we are made to believe that we know nothing, and if we enter the therapy room our child, who we have to live with and raise will not cooperate! What more could be ironical? If we want the society to accept and understand our child, let's start with ourselves! We need to accept and understand our child and be able to include him/her in our families first. As much as our children will need help in functioning in mainstream society , the society too will need help in understanding our children and knowing how to include. They too need training and help to know what to do and what not to.We have to be the role models and the advocates of our children until they are capable of voicing for themselves. It is high time Mothers realize that it is our right and our duty to take charge of the one’s we have given birth to. One, for the sake of our child, and two for the sake of the society. Let us not take credit in saying my child does not cooperate with me but does so only with the therapist! Let’s demand being trained to raise our children. It is our right and our duty too. SAY YES to FAMILY CENTERED THERAPIES. Measure progress in our child by the progress in the quality of life of our family. Do not agree to wait outside while our child is inside. In addition to child safety , our training and empowerment is important to understand and learn how to work around with our child if he or she does not cooperate with us. Seek counselling help for the family if you seem to be fighting a lone battle. It doesn’t make any sense if your child is taught to walk and talk and you end up bankrupt, depressed, anxious and sometimes even divorced with no support from friends or family. It is your child and you need to ASK for training. If the therapist is unwilling to do so rest assured he/she has no clue what they are doing! Find a centre that respects you and your child. Professionals are only facilitators, they cannot take on the role of parenting. You cannot be spending the best part of your life and your child’s life running from pillar to post searching for the best therapist and best therapy. While the professionals need a license and need to pass years of study to become a therapist, we as Mothers need to become an Occupational therapist, speech and language therapist, behavior therapist , special educator and more , all in one and practice with no license or training day in and day out for the rest of our lives. We have to get trained!!! WE ARE THE BEST THERAPIST AND THE BEST THERAPY IS HIDDEN WITHIN MOTHERHOOD! P.S Beware or Be aware of professionals who make you seem dependent on them! "TogetherWeCan Move from Dependence to Independence to Interdependence" twcTogetherWeCan.in
